healing

Today is IT...

So how many of you have received injections?  But ok.. how many of you have had them straight into your vocal chords?  I will today.. probably will film it, and post it.  Why you ask? I have something called Spasmodic Dysphonia. Its an annoying neurological issue between my vocal chord nerves and my brain.  It causes my eyes to twitch, and my vocal chords to "twitch"  causing my voice to sound like I have a cold, etc...

What can you do about it?  Well two things.. 1)  Botox injections right into the vocal chords 2) Surgery.

There is no known "cure" out there.. but there are many people that have it, including my brother which is so strange we both have it! He had surgery.  Scott Adams - creator of Dilbert,  and  Diane Rehm - NPR  are two very well known people that have it.

I got dis baby! Wish me luck!

Igotdisbaby

A Personal Anecdote

In the last 4 years, I've lost my confidence in people. The amount of effort I've taken to make friends with some people that I "thought" were my friends, which turned out to be a lesson for me. I've been crushed and melted by a few who had it in their head, to treat me poorly. I am so good natured, that sometimes I am way too nice to fight back. I finally had to put my foot down, and say.. ENOUGH! Its either them or me.. and I chose myself. To preserve who I am, to preserve the sanity I have left to be there for my family and friends that DO care about me. To also preserve what integrity I had left and talent I have inside to create the music that I do.

I walked away from some important people, that might have made a difference in my musical career.. but for my personal life, made it very difficult for me to have any kind of good feelings or thoughts towards them. I began treating my family and the friends that DO love me and care about me poorly. I decided that I can't work that way and I will not allow anyone to bring me down to their level. I sure as hell will not be a pawn for anyone to play with. It was a non negotiable situation. I wasn't about to stick around and argue about it. So I walked away, and began on the process of healing.

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This road of healing, has opened doors to other people and new friends and old friends that have stood with me. It has opened up new opportunities which I will be announcing in the next month or so. My new album I am working on is also this very personal expression of this lesson that I have learned.I will stand and create the music that is inside of me, MY way.. I will NOT give in to what I did a few years back. I will not give up my integrity to get ahead at the expense of others. THAT is not my M.O.

Get ready for some wonderful moments with me in my journey.. because its going to be super cool!!